Goodbye Zion

I don't really feel like I have the emotional capacity to write about this week, but here goes.

As you know by now, Seth and Sonya lost their baby boy, Zion, last weekend.  They were able to come home from the hospital on Tuesday, once Sonya's blood pressure stabilized.  Coming home to:
*an empty crib
*an empty rocking chair
*baby boy clothes
*brand new maternity clothes
*laying in bed with a quiet stillness where there was so much movement just days ago

But also:
*a steady stream of friends and family
*a house cleaned by friends
*meal after meal after meal
*offers of help for anything and everything
*an abundance of hugs

This morning we had a funeral service for Zion at Riverside Bible Camp, where Seth and Sonya were married.  They put together a powerful service including songs like "Before the Morning". There are no words to describe how painful it is to see an 18" casket holding a tiny body and a lifetime of hopes and dreams.  Or to hear your best friend weep wail as she tries to say goodbye to her baby boy.  Or to watch grown men cry.  And hear little Grace say that she wants to take him home, but eventually kiss her brother's casket and say, "Bye Zion."

It hurts.  Bad.

But there have been glimmers of hope too.  Like the printer who, after printing the bulletins for the funeral, asked Sonya, "Is this your son?"  When she said yes, he replied (with tears in his eyes), "I can't charge you for these.  Just take them and go...I'm so sorry."  Or the family members that drove from Wisconsin, Minnesota, and South Dakota to show their support.  And then, of course, there's Grace.  She is a continuous reminder of how God turned something ugly and painful into something beautiful.

I don't know what the future holds for Seth, Sonya, and Grace.  Doctors have told Sonya her body is "inhospitable" for carrying a baby and it would seem another pregnancy is out of the question.  Please continue to pray for divine comfort and healing for their wounded souls.  And please pray for guidance as they explore the possibilities for future children.  Adoption? Or maybe even surrogacy??!  :)

So for tonight, I will just say...Goodbye, sweet Zion.  I love you always.
-Aunt Sissy